Thursday, November 20, 2008
I always thought I was fat
Even when I wore a size 6 in the seventh grade, I thought I was fat.
Why? Because I couldn't wear a 5 or 3. Everybody else could, but there's Elise with her boobs and ass, having to wear adult women's clothes instead of juniors.
It got worse as I got older. I did gain weight in high school, getting up to a size 12, and my boobs got even bigger. I was wearing a D as a ninth grader (and I should been in the eighth grade), and a DD by the time I graduated. Gross old men would hit on me, not realizing that I was 13 or 14.
In college, away from from my mother's watchful eye, I finally said fuck it, ate whatever I wanted and got really fat.
Thankfully, that part of my life's over, although I still must atone for my early actions with food at the scale every Tuesday.
Looking though old photos this week, I realized that I was never fat in high school. Even when I weighed the most at my senior prom (see above), I wasn't fat, except in my head.
I listened too much to my biological father, who thinks anybody heavier than Kate Moss is gross, and the girls at school, who were straight out of the movie "Mean Girls."