Friday, October 10, 2008

OMG, he's nekkid and hairy! (updated with photo!)

During a particularly strange period of my dating life, I went out with an extremely young (like 20) Mormon, Levi Smith.

It was a fun time, but like most fun times it had to end, mostly because he really wanted to get married and, well, I just wasn't feeling it with him. So he ditched me and took up with ex and, allegedly, married her.

I hadn't heard from him for almost two years, until about 10 weeks ago when he IMd me and asked if I'd come over and have sex.

So I told him I had a boyfriend. He kept pressing. I told him I wasn't interested. He wasn't having it.

Then, I got an e-mail from him, an e-mail that contained naked pictures of him. I did not ask for these. I did not want to see these. He knows that completely naked pictures of guys don't do much for me (now shirtless pictures of guys in low-slung pants where you can see the "V" are a completely different story). Yet, there in my inbox were naked pictures of him, and he was hairy, really hairy, like Burt Reynolds in the 70s posing for the Cosmo centerfold hairy. I wanted to cry, puke and gouge my eyes out all at once.

Then, my IM starts flashing because he's turned on his Web cam. Again, he's naked and hairy and gross. As for me, I am forever traumatized by the sight.


Yea, so Levi looked like that picture of Burt, only much skinnier. (shivers!)


jerwin26 said... he single or what? :D

Jerry Beach said...

Oh. I guess I won't be sending you those pics I took on my camera phone then.